I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
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Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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