That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
