its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I want to be your penis for a week.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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