she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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