The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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