how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
