They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
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