and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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