people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize