omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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