I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
