I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Drunk is not a location!