i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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