pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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