So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I have feelings that need drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize