I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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