he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
he puts the penis in happiness.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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