Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
