On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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