i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
