Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper

  (785): View more from Kansas

  He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper (785): He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not. http://tfl.nu/pqqj
  Replies (32) Good night (3199) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers" http://tfl.nu/rpqk
  Replies (11) Good night (611) Bad night (2262)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet? http://tfl.nu/xg0z
  Replies (11) Good night (4878) Bad night (945) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever. http://tfl.nu/v4fg
  Replies (13) Good night (5447) Bad night (1005) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan http://tfl.nu/uipi
  Replies (16) Good night (5525) Bad night (869) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver. http://tfl.nu/zvig
  Replies (16) Good night (3960) Bad night (1152) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together http://tfl.nu/dsi2
  Replies (6) Good night (3265) Bad night (560) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out. http://tfl.nu/oebq
  Replies (3) Good night (2479) Bad night (1042) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  And I meant every ounce of it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands. (864): And I meant every ounce of it. http://tfl.nu/062o
  Replies (7) Good night (1195) Bad night (2104)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  When did you hit me on the head with a stool?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): When did you hit me on the head with a stool? http://tfl.nu/9f4x
  Replies (10) Good night (850) Bad night (1317) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio. http://tfl.nu/hxom
  Replies (3) Good night (1256) Bad night (411) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right. http://tfl.nu/agio
  Replies (4) Good night (1401) Bad night (579) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (906): I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck. http://tfl.nu/hho5
  Replies (12) Good night (2370) Bad night (387) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot http://tfl.nu/7zmw
  Replies (7) Good night (2127) Bad night (372) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head. http://tfl.nu/rwbn
  Replies (11) Good night (2482) Bad night (348) Order T-Shirt

Randomize