he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He passed out mid-signature
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
They are going to name an STD after you.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
