Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
