threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
