your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Randomize