Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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