We should be called the Road Head Warriors
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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