What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
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You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
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Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
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