Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
