You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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