Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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