Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize