i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
19 Teachers Share the Funniest Items Brought to “Show and Tell”
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.