just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
