Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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