am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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