there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
