I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
