you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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