Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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