Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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