lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
