There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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