omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I just threw up on my dentist
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize