no, he came in my armpit
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
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I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
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I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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