We got so high we made milksteak
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
