he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize