it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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