Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize