found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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