So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
