dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
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she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
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I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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