so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
